My name is Joshua Barker and this is the testimony of how Jesus Christ changed my life forever. When I was 10 years old I lost my mother to a drug-induced heart attack, in other words, she fell victim to an overdose.When I found out that the cause of her death was because of drugs. I remember entering a very dark place in my mind, and starting off at the very young age of 10, I often contemplated suicide, as well as acting out against my dad and the rest of my family. At her memorial people attempted to reach out to me and comfort me, telling me that she was with God and that He took her from me,because of the hate and the hurt I was harboring in myself I decided to not believe in God. Around age 12 I began to use drugs and alcohol in an attempt to suppress the grief and anxiety I felt when I thought about life. I emphasize all of these things because they are a big part of why I am who I am today.Now, fast-forward a few years and I’m 20 years old, already out of high school,and I found myself in a bit of a sticky situation… I was getting kicked out of the house I grew up in because of the way I was walking all over my dad and disrespecting the fact that he was still allowing me to stay there. So, I found myself homeless for the first time and let me be the first to say, that was a very scary realization, because I was by myself, nobody to call, nobody to go to, completely alone. The way I attempted to blind myself from that fact was through even more drug use and starting a career in crime. After 2 years of being on the streets, in and out of jail institutions and hospitals, I remember I had just gotten released from jail in Orange County, where the majority of my homeless life took place, and I was encountered by Christ through this older couple at the a courthouse.
They prayed for me to come to salvation and that God would enter my heart… And He did,in a major way, because 2 weeks later I found myself here at Set Free Men’s Ranch in Phelan. I remember very clearly the day I actually made Jesus Christ my Lord and Savior. It was on July 11th, 2014 that my name was written in the Lamb’s book of Life. God had his hand on my life the entire time,keeping me from losing my life through all of the scary situations I found myself in.
I am proud to call myself God’s child because He never ceases to amaze me every day. I pray for things that align with His will for my life,things concerning righteousness and furthering His gospel message. He took my anxiety and depression and filled that empty place in me with His unconditional love for all people, and He even took my dark past and changed it from a vessel of dishonor into a vessel of honor, and I’m able to minister to people going through loss and anxiety and depression through His Spirit. The last 4 and a half years have not been easy because if had my fair share of bumping my head and being disciplined by the Father, but I refuse to give up. God has carried me so far that there is no way I can give up, I refuse to do that. I’m happy to say that I am being made into the mighty man of God that He desires me to become, and I’m not planning on trying to prevent that. Thank you Jesus for saving me from myself and giving me a new life that is more abundant than my old one, Amen.
